Section 8 or Bust....

I really question the basic intelligence of people sometimes. I understand that the intentions are good, for the most part, but I really wonder. Take for example, today. Today my social worker came for her monthly visit. Had I known, she be such a pain, I never would have signed up for the program. Actually, to be honest, I think there's a serious misrepresentation about the whole thing. When she first called, it was called "Childcare Services" provided by the hospital. Now, me and Rian are thinking it's a day care program. Well, turns out its voluntary scrutiny by Virginia Beach's finest social workers...or not. Now, I'm a young, first-time mother and I gladly accept the offer of friendly advice from time to time. I am not, however, an ignorant crack-whore, popping out babies so I can sell food stamps for drugs. That's apparently a hard concept to grasp for this woman. I'm far from perfect but I think I do a good job. Well, last month she criticized everything from the food I was feeding her, to our dog Sarah. Last month was irritating, but this month was over the top ignorant. Her first concerned of course was the food I was feeding her again. "Don't feed her fruits to start or she won't eat vegetables" Of course, she eats fruits for breakfast, vegetables for lunch, meat and veggies for dinner and dessert if she's good. Not one problem with any of the foods. Plus my pediatrician said start with fruits so the transition into solid foods was a pleasant experience. Who do you think I listened to there? Then she disapproved with the feeding schedule. I feed her when she's hungry as much as she wants to eat, no more no less. she says "babies need structure" I say, I'd rather her eat out of hunger as opposed to eating only out of routine hungry or not. I think eating when hungry is the key to staying trim. Whatever. Then it was bedtime, she needs structure in a crib. She sleeps in a crib but falls asleep on her granny's lap. So what where she falls asleep. She's being loved and nurtured, what's wrong with that? Plus, she sleeps through the night. I think we are doing very well. But the best one yet is the section 8 housing. She says, "I highly recommend you applying for section 8 housing. It's based off of his (Rian's) income and you can stay at home with the baby till she's ready to go to school." WHAT?!! First of all, Section 8 housing is based on income without current expenses. So we couldn't do it after all. Second of all, I AM NOT STAYING UNEMPLOYED THAT LONG!!!!! Aradia won't start school for several years! I'll go insane before that. Third of all, Section 8 housing around here is a neighborhood called Twin Canals. This neighborhood is notorious for gun issues, burglary, gang violence and drugs. Sounds like a nice family place doesn't it? Give me a fucking break! When I said that I didn't think we were ready for a move like that, she proceeds to insist that living here in this quiet, safe, little neighborhood with his parents is unhealthy and we need our own space. Okay, so lets recapfor those of us who are too smart to understand what she just said. She said that my fiance and my infant daughter shouldn't live with the nurturing, loving, family in this safe neighborhood to live in the drug, gun and gang infested projects were it's "healthier" for us. Answer me this, how is a kilo of crack and bullet holes in the window safer than the loving arms of family? The best part is, she herself admits she would never dare walk that area after dark...hmmmmm I wonder why? Frankly, I think she has a couple of screws loose. I'm staying right where I'm at thank you very much. And you know what? If that makes me a terrible mother then I'll take that hit really. I'll be okay. Unfortunately for me, the program I signed up for, lasts the first year of Aradia's life. That means five more months of ignorance. I can't wait....
I think what it comes down to, is that I have been so concerned and self conscience of my success as a mother, that I've spent way to much time relying on the advice of other people instead of listening to my own instincts. I'm not an idiot and the more I listen to these "bits" of advic, the more I realize how much better off I would have been if I just figured it out for myself. Rian and I are good parents, who love our baby more than ourselves. She is always fed until full, cleaned, bathed, dressed and loved like no other. At the end of the day, what more does this child need?